Two days ago, I was standing next to my mother waiting in line at the check-out at a grocery store. I was just loafing about when I noticed that the couple standing before me had a toddler sitting in their shopping trolley. He (or she, I couldn't tell) was staring at me. Right between the eyes. I started thinking about people having eye contact with each other.
In the individualistic society we live in, staring at each other without a reason is strange and awkward. Just like we prefer the invisible bubble of personal space around us only to be entered by people we really like, we feel that it's really uncomfortable to be stared at. Visual molestation, as I like to call it.
Most Hollywood movies portray the crossing of eyes as an indicator of an oncoming relationship. When eyes meet and the staring lasts more than approximately 4 seconds, we know that a passionate kiss is nearby. When someone stares at me, I will soon feel an awkward sensation. I probably won't feel strong enough to keep my gaze focused on the other person's eyes. I guess it's because I'm afraid that the person I'm looking at will get the wrong message. Eye-fucking can be a very dangerous thing to do, especially when your not willing to do the same in a sexual way. Consequently, I avoid it.
Since the toddler in the shopping trolley before me wasn't looking away, I decided to persevere. He didn't stop looking at me. But neither did I. For one second, I was doubtful; should I let him win this staring contest? Then I smiled a little, trying to put the little fellow off, restoring the power balance by showing that I was the one holding the confidence here. Mr. Toddler, clearly unaware of the underlying values, dodged my attempt to win by returning the call. I got one of the purest, teethless smiles I saw in a long, long time. Incredibly cute and disarming as it was, it made my day. I returned the smile. Then, still smiling and seemingly fully amazed, he looked at my mother, initiating a second competition. My mother lost. I don't think she really cared too much about it, though.
My advice for a happy 2010: stare at toddlers!
X!
In the individualistic society we live in, staring at each other without a reason is strange and awkward. Just like we prefer the invisible bubble of personal space around us only to be entered by people we really like, we feel that it's really uncomfortable to be stared at. Visual molestation, as I like to call it.
Most Hollywood movies portray the crossing of eyes as an indicator of an oncoming relationship. When eyes meet and the staring lasts more than approximately 4 seconds, we know that a passionate kiss is nearby. When someone stares at me, I will soon feel an awkward sensation. I probably won't feel strong enough to keep my gaze focused on the other person's eyes. I guess it's because I'm afraid that the person I'm looking at will get the wrong message. Eye-fucking can be a very dangerous thing to do, especially when your not willing to do the same in a sexual way. Consequently, I avoid it.
Since the toddler in the shopping trolley before me wasn't looking away, I decided to persevere. He didn't stop looking at me. But neither did I. For one second, I was doubtful; should I let him win this staring contest? Then I smiled a little, trying to put the little fellow off, restoring the power balance by showing that I was the one holding the confidence here. Mr. Toddler, clearly unaware of the underlying values, dodged my attempt to win by returning the call. I got one of the purest, teethless smiles I saw in a long, long time. Incredibly cute and disarming as it was, it made my day. I returned the smile. Then, still smiling and seemingly fully amazed, he looked at my mother, initiating a second competition. My mother lost. I don't think she really cared too much about it, though.
My advice for a happy 2010: stare at toddlers!
X!
